WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

A Posts that starts with me having like no idea where it's going to end or even the general idea.

The first thought coming to my mind now is the thought of change.I'm wondering what would it have been like if I had acted differently,if things had turned out differently.

She sat there looking at me and I could see that look in her eyes,I could tell,even if people told me otherwise,that she loved me.She would shout at me in public,she even threw her drink in my face that one time at the beach but I know that she still loves me.

That's why I have her in my place all tied and beaten up....Now who's laughing?

I told y'all that she would be mine some day but y'all thought I was lying.It's been 11 months,three days and 14 hours since she became mine.My possession to use whenever I wanted.

I held her hands now and she looked at me with that same look,definetely love was in the air.

I turned to descend the stairs when I felt some swift movement behind me,I turned to find out what it was but it was too late,I hadn't even made a 90° when the cylinder of the fire extinguisher impacted on my forehead.

Everything went green-now I know they lie when they say you see white or black and hear noises-I found myself before a Big man whose face I couldn't see because of the light and awesomeness that surrounded him.

His voice was the most gentle,I've ever heard.Soothing as a deep sleep.

I heard him say, "Take him away,his name is not here"

"Who was and where were they taking me to?", I asked myself

Just then I felt the heat and a piercing scream struck my eardrums.I knew I was going to like it where I was going to.


*******************************************************************

I woke up and knew at that point that I had to stop obsessing about Rekia,I definetely had to stop.

NOT ANYMORE

Walking down the road,I started to realise how much my life had changed in just a couple of months.I now had way much money than I ever dreamed I could have.I wore clothes that I didn't need...Who the heck changes five times a day? and into specially matching outfits?

I look at myself in the mirror and I'm disgusted by what I see.time was when I used to derive joy to see my cute face,nicely muscled,fatless body and my hair had me wondering if it was really mine.I thought I was a sight to see.I thought I was beautiful.Today it's not the case..No,not anymore.

On the exterior,I'm looking faboulous,exactly like I always dreamed.But internally,I know better,I know it's just like a scotch-egg.A rotten egg inside and yummy,mouth-watering coat on the outside.You never know until you bite.

I have on 6 articles of clothing,I now live in a cold part of the world.I now kiss boys.....yes BOYS,just to get money.I do things that Mum will never approve of.She would say "that's not what good boys do!"

I had all it took to be a success btu I got carried away by the fancy things,the cars,the clothes,everthing looked so...so....Amazing!

But No!....Not anymore.I try to think,how I got so filthy in such a short time.i definetely don't like the person I am now.it's not who I wanna be.I look at my life and I wonder if I'm in a movie or something.

I'd read books and see movies with men that do real awful things and I'd wonder how they changed from being innocent,cute,young kids that they once were to being diabolic humans,Now I think I have an idea...they didn't plan it.

The story of my new "job" started with clara,I think of her still.....


hehehe How y'all doing? holla at all my pips
Got mad love for y'all
sorry I'm having these sick Ideas these day but it's the most I can do with what I have right now
Cheers!

I DON'T REMEMBER

I stood there looking at it's face.
It was crying and it seemed to only have one purpose:

Annoy me out of my mind

She had left him with me since last week.Just after my last rest that lasted 30mins.

She had come in just after I had fallen asleep.

She had told me it's name but now I don't remember.

I think she said it was a girl.....or was it a boy.....I seriously don't remember.

The last time I cahnged it's diapers I was tranced,under the spell of insomnia that I barely recall what I saw.

I walked slowly to it's crib,I put in my hands to grab it's neck with a desperate look on my face.I had to do it.

I had to sleep.

I saw it's face turn from red to white.It wasn't crying now.

Just then the phone rang and a voice said "Look out the window"

There I saw Mrs. Bolaji,the nosy bitch

"I called the Police and they're on their way",she said.I felt like dying and that point

then she added,"I also called the hospital son,you need help"

I never thought I could see the day I'd be thankful for the nosy B****h.I just glided into oblivion in a silence...strangely.

I thought I heard someone walk in but I don't remember...I don't remember

THE YEARS OF SLAVERY AND....

....then freeedom came spontaneously.It felt weird at the beginning,none of us believed that after 5 years or being subjected to feeling enslaved,we finally had room to spread out our wings.

Our tale of life in secondary school might be similar to only a few but then among those few,we stood out.That morning I walked down the "sacred pathway" that the senior students had coveted for themselves only.We were more like animals destined to walk on the grassy,sandy pathwayalong with the Herbivores.
On the food chain the dog was on a higher strata than we,every rabies bite fearing senior let the dogs be.

As I walked down that morning at about 6:00am,I met Jeff along the way.He looked at me knowingly and we both burst out in screams of joy until someone in a window shouted at us to stop disturbing their sleep.

We parted,and I walked over to the final year students dormitory.I stood right in front and stared at the set of supposedly humans that caused us and our parents pain for over 5 years.I clenched my fist and felt like hurting someone,I felt like hurting all of them.

There they were smiling and rejoicing.

Why were they rejoicing?

Certainly not for the fact they they had come to the enc of their secondary studies

NO

It was for how they had gotten away with all the evil things they had done.These evils varied from extorting from someone,a set of provisions meant for a couple of months and wastefully consuming it in a day.It was with these guys that I saw a can of 350g powdered milk get dissolved in a cup of 5cl.The things they did with our provisions made me wonder sometimes if these people had any conscience.

A couple of them saw me and stopped smiling immediately.On a normal day I couldn't even dare to think of standing where I stood that day so they probably thought I had something backing me.They quickly moved away.Inside of me I felt joy.The joy of taking back what was rightfully mine,my freedom,even if I didn't fight for it when I should have.

I turned and walked slowly to my dormitory,I reminensced about all the times I had run away from that dormitory to avoid being caught by another senior.I had never noticed that there was a divinely beautiful flower plant by the side of the pathway.Not that I liked fllowers or that kinda stuff but I'm just normally a kind of person who notices stuff and also notice when they change.I was feeling like .....



I got back to my dormitory and there were "parties" going on.Boys were celebrtaing the "new era" with garri,cornflakes,cabin biscuits all mixed together in buckets and sauced with milk and chocolate beverages.

I sat on my bed and began to plot my next use of this new foud freedom,it was going to be the freedom of expression,the liberty to express my feelings to miss Daisy anywhere I met her and not worry about any stupid ass senior sending me to buy him some snacks with my own money.

I was imagigining me kissing her already.I smiled and that smile didn't leave my face throughout that day.I sighed with dreamy eyes

"OH DAISY!....."

DAMN!!

Why does it have to be this way?

I see her in the bus and my heart melts,I try not to look at her but I find myself staring everytime I sense a movement in her direction

"Is she getting out of the bus?",I ask myself

I turn to find that she's still there,unaware that I even exist or ....

I look at the woman selling fruits by the side of the road,she looked beautiful and like she could have done a whole lot better with her life,but then I didn't know a thing about her so I wasn't going to start writing up her life's story.

A girl in a red cardigan walked up to her and started picking up some oranges,I noticed the cardigan was kinda nice and I turned away.At the same moment she turned to frown at some tout who had accidentally hit her without apologising.

I saw her face,I had been so engrossed by the woman selling orabges that I didn't even notice when she alighted the bus.The bus began to move .....DAMN!!!

I noticed that she was through with her bargaining and was paying for the oranges.I began to holler the bus driver to stop so I could make my way towards "SHE" but being my lucky day,the bus driver had to be playing some stupid ass yoruba music.He eventually heard me,but had to move a further 50m before he could find a place to park.

I hastily paid him and didn't even bother for change,a nasty mistake I was only to realise later.

I made my way towards the orange seller woman,who didn't appear to be as potential as I thought.Her spoken english only went to confirm my thoughs as she replied my enquiries of the direction her "red cardiganed female costumer" had taken

"Me I no dey sell funnel,waka go mama Flour shop go ask!

or was it "mama flower"?

I I told her I didn't mean funnel but female which is the same thing as girl but as she wasn't still understanding me,I tried to communicate in my "clssiest" pidgin english ever

"shey you see wan girl,wey wear red swota(sweater/cardigan),wey follow you buy market now now,you sabi where she pass?"

After about 3 mins of time I didn't have,I was able to extract from her that my prey had boarded a bus nearby,which was just moving away

DAMN!...

I quckly looked for a motor bike taxi(okada)

" BROS!!!!.......make you follow that "Danfo" bus "

I wasn't taking any chances with deaf or illiterate people anymore not in my life time

The chase went on for a while until I saw her get off the bus about 30 mins later,I instantly paid off "bros" and in the process "throwing away" a certain amount of money that I would have normally not dreamt of spending but I was "knocked down" by ....... "was it love?"

I approached "mademoiselle" saying

"Hi,I would..."

The words never came out of my mouth as I saw some angrily determined individual walking towards me and I think these were the words I heard

"Maga wey dey find Kpomo,if you no won go another place go find am you go see kpakpo"

I didn't wait to find out what those words meant,cos an hour of street education had intensely broadened my pidgin englis vocabulary.

I half flew,half ran,feeling the soles of my feet move close to my ears.Luckily "Bros" hadn't moved away

And surprisingly I heard these words come out my mouth

"Ja!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Yeah it could qualify for more that one word cos I didn't hear it as one word at the moment

I and bros sped off on his motor bike with my heart in my mouth and my arms around his body.....at least until I noticed the pervert having some stupid-ass smiley expression on his face.



This story came out as I put my hands to keyboard I hope y'all like it cos I had na opportunity to blog and I had to improvise.....got mad love for y'all CHEERS

MISSING IT

I would like to just leave a couple of words and let all those who pass by here know that I'm alive and in goo health lol

I'm kinda unavailable for the while and don't know when I'll have a chance to note down a couple of random thoughts that pass through my brain some of the times

Miss you all like ....... Kuli kuli nah maybe more!*

cheers my loves

P.S

holla at my girl Ms' dufa

I'M GETTING MARRIED

Growing up,I used to watch tv programmes like cartoons in the day time from 4pm cos that was the time those stupid NTAs began broadcast and talking bout NTA,any Lagos pips remember NTA channel 7?

Let's say cartoons were on the different station till 6:30 sometimes 7pm but after that we never really knew cos it was then time for news and ish and God bless our yanshes if we didn't have the station changed to NTA 10,they had basically the same news with NTA 5 but 10 had a clearer reception.

I know y'all is getting a bit confused for some pips who didn't have the priviledge of growing up in lagos around the same era I did.They were five Tv stations when I was younger like OGTV-which was being broadcasted from ogun state,there were the NTAs 5,7 and 10 and then there was the Lagos TV(LTV).

I would have to endure watching the news sometime so that I wouldn't miss the begining of the soap opera that would follow.The glory days of "the rich also cry", "Maria Los angeles" "wild rose" "secrets of the sands"-my fav and all the others.before these soaps would begin there would be an assault of commercials the guiness' adverts,Coca cola's and the point of this post the CIGARETTE adverts.

I adored those adverts they were always so futuristically neat and gave you the impression of a successful man of class.The houses ,the cribs and the way they placed the cigarettes on the tables or took a wiff of the smoke.It all made me feel so giddy and I began to dream.Till this day my dream model of a house came from one of the adverts in a magazine,I think it was Malboro or was it rothman's....I forget.

It had this magnificently white crib with a whitish marble table that had some kinda patterns,cool patters on it.And the dude placed his pack of cigarettes on the table togathet with his keys tto a BIG BMW which was parked outside.He was dressed so nicely and he was walking into the arms of his wife*now that I know better girlfriend or maybe even uncommited "friend"* who was equally*more than actually* divinely dressed.

There was a Piano in the background and the house had a view of nature like crazily pretty nature not the kind of nature you see in farms or ish the kind you get from moutains and unadulterated landscapes.

At about the same time,I discovered THE LADY.

I would come home every sunday to meet some stupid TV programme on NTA 5 where there played "stupid" love songs that would make me feel sick.I so hated loving and mushiness when I was little.It's a surprise that today......I digresss.

Anyways,one day I came home and there she was on the TV screen,the woman I had every intention to marry,the woman I would live with in my all white crib and drive my car with her by my side *that was the general idea in my little days I naturally felt it was the responsibility of a man to drive and the woman by his side holding his hand and ish but today,I know women who drive like "witches"*And we were going to live happily in the house just holding hands every night.She was beautiful,had a nice face and she sang and to me that was all that mattered.I didn't go round obsessing about women with extra large this or that.

She had on a wedding gown and she was singing some ish that I didn't quite understand but she didn't look happy and my 7 year old self or was I six? well I just wanted to comfort her,hold her in my arms and make her pain go away.I wanted to promise her that I was never going to cheat on her or leave her side and ish.I wanted to e the best man ever for her,reall,all 7 year old of me.

The next time I saw her,she didn't have on the wedding gown but this time I understood what she was saying "How could an angel break my heart?" I felt guilty immediatel cos there had been this pretty girl in school who sat two seats away from me whose hand I so wanted to hold.I cried when I heard her sing,it was like she was talking to me and she was crying because of me.


From Toni with love
I thought to my self "what have I done? exactly what I promised I wouldn't do"

All the while I never noticed the guys in the videos and how much she would kiss them and be engaged in a funny kinda embrace clothless.I asked my mum why she had no clothes on,she said that it was all "film trick" that reassured me especially when she offered to show me how a kiss was done in "film trick" I rudely declined "No don't worry" I think were my exact words but in a tone that had mixed emotions or surprise,disgust and fear.

Once again I was in love with Toni,more with her voice that didn't sound like all the girly girls I knew.she seemed to me like a woman I would play football with and stuff,despite the promiscuously short clothing she wore in her vids.I didn't mind,I didn't mind anything when it came to Toni,I was in love.

Until one day I saw her with a man in the video "How many ways",ever since I had known her,she sang of heartbreak and I was there to comfort her and now she was leaving me to sing for some disgustingly *now I think awesomely* muscled dude with "fried" hair.I felt so annoyed and betrayed.she never sang that kind of song to me or bothered to come look for me to hold me and kiss me on my lips like she did to the dude.



I broke up with toni that day and only forgave her some 8 years afterwards when she did this crazily nice video of "he wasn't man enough for me" I guess she had left the "fried" haired "kpako" dude.

I don't know how to end this but I know I was a maga*like scribbles says*

That's all folks.It's your boy gfunc