lundi 6 juin 2011

Keyboard happy

Nowadays, I look at these young ones knowingly when they talk about all these social networks. In my days, when you heard the word "network", you thought about electricity, but today it's about computer networks and social metworks. How times have changed...

In those days, my only means of communicating with people, other than actually going to see them, was by letters and telegrams. Most people don't even know what telegrams are these days. Back in my days if you sent someone a telegram, you would go around feeling like you was the s*** (yes granny knows your lingo)

I used to be the girl whose yansh, all those boys would stare at and fall into gutters. Yes I was the .... Back then I made sense *winks* . I once had a white man stop his car to talk to me while I was on my way to the stream.

It was a day like every other day, I had noticed a car drive past on my way to the stream and on my way back, the car was parked by the side of the road next to Ima's father's hut. Christopher - He had told me I could call him that, even though I insisted with Sir - was seated on the hood of his ride smoking a cigarette.

I can remember thinking to myself that he wasn't like the reverend father who my naive self had begun to believe was some form of divine being and I never seemed to be able to read into his eyes. But with Christopher it was different, first of all, it was obvious that he was human because he coughed twice while exhaling smoke like when water was used to quench the flames of the wood in the fireplace. And then when I looked in his eyes I knew exactly what was on his mind. It was the same look that Obinna had in his eyes when he talked to me on the ufo market day.

As Christopher tred to make talk with me I quicly told him that I needed to go home as I was expected to return with the water and I couldn't be seen talking to just any man. I hurried away from him so as to make sure no one saw us together. Even though I knew that eyes had seen and mouths would talk while ear would hear evn if they weren't listening that I Osa, daughter of Ovie, had been admired by a white man.

From then on, the suitors didn't stop coming to Ovie - my father's house. The village head all of a sudden decided that Ovie should be decorated as a chief. My mother's shop was packed with customers even after she had sold all her wares. One customer had offered to buy her slippers at a ridiculously expensive price, she had almost slapped him.

All these things other favours were shown to my family members just because of the 67.87 seconds that I had spent it Christopher. *Dont ask how I calculated the time because everyone know that Nokia phones come with the stopwatch feature ... Duh ! *



SO nowadays when I look at these young men that come to see my grand-daughters and be telling me about school and how they want to study with girls that live at 150 naira okada away from where their own houses are, I want to slap the taste out of their mouth. What do they think, that because my breasts are sagging, tha means my brain is too ???

SMH at these youngings, Don't be stoopid Aww !!! :D

9 commentaires:

  1. hahahahahahahahahaaa....G-FUNC! like this style of writing...funny as usual..yea! granny do know her grammar...of course! becox her breast don sag no mean say she is not still pretty! so LETTER WRITING VS CHATTING/TEXTING huh?..

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  2. hehe. Just decided that i had to post somthing and i remembered this. It was based on something I had thought about at an earlier date.

    I see you on blogsville. Keep doing what you do ! I enjoy your posts well

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  3. Nice post--very funny! If only things like dese happen in these days where you will be favored becuz oyibo man talked to u--in dat case i for don.....Lets leave it dia!
    loL
    Now i am even confused sef, are u a boy or girl?
    X_X

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  4. @Dee: Lol, i actually am a guy :D . I actually don't believe that just cos a person is liked by a white man then automatically people who never even knew they existed before start to recognise them . It would be a good thing for the beneficiary to enjoy special treatment but I think it would be wrong if things worked that way.

    I can't even say where I go this idea from. I just wanted to put up a post jor

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  5. hahahahhah! Nice post again :)

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  6. i want oyibo man to talk to me lol... i need favors. lovely post

    www.chizys-spyware.blogspot.com
    Chizy

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  7. Lol @ Chizy K: I wish it were that simple
    Thanks for leaving a comment :) I'm already at your's . Cheers !!!

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  8. hi,
    thanks for your compliment, also for reading and commenting on my blog!

    by the way i think this story is random but hilarious :)

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  9. Lol About the story being random, tu n'as pas tort . You're welcome because the pleasure really is mine :D

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